Cover Your Ears

“That kid’s a terrible dancer!”

When I said that to my wife I was just kidding, but only a bit. Many of the little kids wildly dancing around in circles at this month’s Irish 2000 Festival, really were terrible dancers.

But could it be that some of them couldn’t hear the music?

A number of parents had outfitted their little squirts with earmuff style hearing protection to guard their wee ears from the Screaming Orphans up on stage.

I’ve seen this before, but never have I seen so many kids with the colorful protective devices. And they were side-by-side with just as many (or more) young kids without them.

Now, this is not the place for my observations about the parents. It would be wrong to make snap judgements based on their appearance, and I would never suggest that the ear muff crowd looked like insufferably annoying people. That would be wrong, wouldn’t it?

Anyway, I trust that the ear muff children will grow up enjoying the benefits that come with having better hearing: they will be more attentive in school, get better grades, go to more prestigious universities, earn more money and subsequently be better citizens.

In the end, the ear muff parents will have the last laugh against those fools that allowed their kids to enjoy themselves bare-eared without the encumbrance of those ridiculous looking but extremely practical accessories. The rewards in life will not go to the best dancers, but to the ones with the clearest hearing.

4 responses to “Cover Your Ears

  1. I gave one of my kids ear protection when she was little not to save her hearing, but because she otherwise couldn’t handle the loud music and would be miserable and force me to leave. All selfishness, have no fear.

    • That’s an excellent point. I remember being forced to leave a monster truck show at the Knick Arena because it was too loud for my son. In the case of that event, it was painfully loud, even for me.

  2. Hopefully at least they took the Kid Leashes off them. You wouldn’t want them to get tangled up while dancing. That could hurt the self esteem.

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