CSI: Glenmont


On Thursday, March 26 Ann Madeo of (address redacted), Glenmont reported three incidents of suspected canine vandalism. It is believed that they occurred on or around March 25.

According to Mrs. Madeo a copy of of William Patrick’s Saving Troy was discovered in the master bedroom with its cover ripped off, a 2.6 cubic foot hole was found dug in the backyard, and the molding surrounding the downstairs hall closet door was damaged.

Teeth marks were apparent on both the book and molding. Close examination of the hole clearly showed marks in the dirt consistent with the size and shape of a dog’s paw.

Two Australian Shepherds residing in the home were interviewed separately. Both were cooperative while questioned, but neither admitted any knowledge of the incidents. It was observed that the dog known as Scarlett had flecks of dirt on the area around her nose.

The initial results of the investigation were inconclusive. DNA analysis is an option, but may be prohibitively expensive when weighed against the cost of repair and replacement.

Because it is possible that some of the damaged material was ingested, it was recommended that Mrs. Madeo collect the fecal matter of the dogs. It may be possible to recover undigested content related to the damage, and while this does not constitute absolute proof, it could be considered a strong indication of involvement.

It was further suggested that if there are repeated incidents of this nature, video surveillance be employed to provide a record of of events when the human occupants are away from the household.

The Beer Report

Do a Google News search of  the words beer assault. You will find that my favorite recreational beverage is often involved in trouble. Who knew? This is not to say that good things don’t happen when beer is involved —it’s just that they don’t make the news. A few notable stories:

EASTON – An 18-year-old Easton man was arrested Sunday after stabbing his father during an argument over his father’s refusal to pay him back for the beer he’d confiscated, State Police said. Police say Adam Wilson was apparently upset that his father, 48-year-old Thomas Wilson, would not pay him back for a 30-pack of beer he’d confiscated after finding it in his son’s possession a few days earlier. WRGB-TV

GLENS FALLS – A Queensbury man who was upset a convenience store clerk would not sell him beer early Sunday was arrested after he hit the clerk with the two 12-packs he sought to buy, police said.  Glens Falls Post Star

HILTON HEAD ISLAND – A 30-year-old Hilton Head Island man was punched in the face after he refused to go on a beer run, a Beaufort County sheriff’s report released Monday said. The man told deputies he and two friends had been drinking beer when they ran out and wanted more. When the man told his friends he had no money and couldn’t buy more beer, he was punched in the face and threatened with a screwdriver, the report said.  The Island Packet

LILLINGTON – A Lillington woman was arrested by the Harnett County Sheriff’s Office after she allegedly stabbed an acquaintance twice in the head in an argument over beer. Shemeka Nicole Moore, 28, of McCoy Lane in Lillington was charged with assault with a deadly weapon with intent to kill inflicting serious injury. The Daily Record

Slice of Life

Violence isn’t funny, but I just can’t help it: I love stories about women with knives.

Woman Arrested in Bremerton Knife Incident
A woman was arrested on suspicion of assault with a deadly weapon Wednesday for allegedly threatening her boyfriend with a knife. The 55-year-old man said he awoke at his Country Lane apartment to find the 34-year-old woman holding a butcher knife to his neck. The man, who said he’s in poor health and has one year to live, said the girlfriend was upset because she thinks he’s having an affair with his caregiver. He denied that and said his medical problems prevent it.

Easton woman arrested after allegedly threatening man with knife, hitting him with broomstick
A 25-year-old Easton woman was arrested after she allegedly threatened a man with a knife and hit him with a broomstick Monday. Amelia Napoli of the first block of North Fourth Street was arrested at her home after the alleged domestic incident, according to a news release issued this morning. Police said Napoli threatened Carlton Duval at 7:25 a.m.

Woman displays knife during fight
A Fremont woman was arrested early this morning after displaying a knife during a family argument, Fremont Police reported. Brooke Mulford, 27, was charged with disorderly conduct and disturbing the peace, Class III misdemeanors. Lt. Jeff Elliott said officers were dispatched at 2:15 a.m. to a home in the 800 block of W. Tenth Street where Mulford was accused of displaying a knife while fighting with family members. When officers arrived, she already had been disarmed.

Altercation ends in mother’s arrest
A Monroe woman was arrested Monday night after she allegedly tried to stab her daughter with a knife after a verbal altercation. Linda Bowman, 52, of 1612 S. First St., was taken to Richwood Correctional Center, where she allegedly refused to give her name. After the officer searched her, he found a crack pipe in a cigarette carton, according to the arrest affidavit.

Yonkers woman, 80, accused of making threats with knife
An 80-year-old Yonkers woman is facing menacing and weapons charges after she was accused of threatening another tenant in her Warburton Avenue apartment building with a kitchen knife, police said.
Ann Pelligilini of 650 Warburton Ave. is charged with menacing and fourth-degree criminal possession of a weapon, both misdemeanors.

The Xmas Files

The Santa suit killer is one of the most tragic and appalling stories of the entire year, but I just knew if I did a Google News search of the words Christmas and arrested, I’d find something to cheer me up:

Couple Arrested After Christmas Gift Fight
PORTSMOUTH – A Portsmouth, N.H., couple was arrested on Christmas Day after a gift-giving miscue erupted into a violent fist fight, the Boston Herald reports. Police arrested Heath Blom, 26, and Randi Young, 24, and charged both with assault after finding them bruised and battered at the South Street home they share with Blom’s grandparents. According to Portsmouth police, Blom was disappointed when he did not receive the $1,000 airplane he had asked for from his grandparents, and was underwhelmed by the gift he received from Young: a Nintendo Wii video game console.

Man Busted for Loud Christmas Music
SWAMPSCOTT-Swampscott police threw the book at a Puritan Road man for allegedly playing Christmas music too loud at his apartment this past Sunday, charging him with multiple counts of disturbing the peace, civil rights violations and criminal harassment. Arnulf Simmon, 67, of 50 Puritan Road #2, Swampscott, was arrested Dec. 21 shortly after 7 p.m. after a neighbor complained he was playing Christmas music too loud.

Son Charged With Stealing Christmas Presents
SCHAUMBURG – After coming home to find his children’s presents stolen from underneath the Christmas tree, David Olson Sr. felt violated. But when he suspected that his older son was the culprit, he was torn. How do I turn in my own son to police? he wondered. “Especially on Christmas,” Olson Sr. said.

Movie Theater Closes After Christmas Night Brawl
EATONTOWN – A fight in a Monmouth Mall movie theater spilled outside into the lobby and forced the box office to close early on Christmas night, police said. Three juveniles were arrested following the altercation, which took place during a showing of the movie, “Seven Pounds” in theater number 13.

Baby Jesus Thefts Draw Notice
Judging from reports from around the country – from South Jersey and Bucks County to the Alaska town made famous by the “Bridge to Nowhere” – pilferings of the Baby Jesus seem to be on rise. Since Thanksgiving, figurines of the holy infant have been stolen from public squares, churches, front yards and funeral homes.

Deal With The Devil

Jack Blake
Jack Blake

Jack Owen Blake would be about my age today had Arthur Shawcross not murdered him in 1972. He was ten. Four months Shawcross raped and killed eight-year-old Karen Hill. She’d be 44.

Arthur Shawcross confessed to the murders, but Jefferson County District Attorney William J. McClusky was doubtful about his case and eager for a conviction. So he made an offer: Shawcross would be spared a murder charge and a life term if he’d tell authorities where he had hidden the body of Jack Blake. Shawcross accepted and served 15 years of his 25 year sentence. He was paroled and later went on to kill eleven women in the Rochester area.

Nothing could have saved those two innocent children in 1972, but you’ve got to wonder about DA McClusky. What could have made him think a jury in Watertown, NY wouldn’t want to lock up Shawcross and throw away the key? Instead he got to walk free and murder again.

Shawcross died in an Albany hospital this week, brought there after falling ill at Sullivan Correctional Facility. Unlike his many victims, Arthur Shawcross went the way many of us will go, in a hospital being cared for by people fighting to keep us alive.

There hasn’t been an execution in New York since 1963, but if anyone ever deserved it, it was Arthur Shawcross. And if you think you can explain why a man who murdered thirteen people shouldn’t have been put to death, you’re welcome to try.

This Week In the Cutlery Department

Alright, it’s been established that if a woman gets angry she may use her shoe to attack you —but if she gets really, really angry she’s heading for the kitchen.

NORWICH, Conn. – A Norwich woman was arrested Wednesday night on charges she slashed a man with a meat cleaver during a domestic dispute. 

WOODSTOCK, Ont. – Police have a woman in custody after a downtown stabbing early Thursday morning. A 45-year-old man was rushed to hospital around 12 a.m., after an altercation with a known suspect at a Dundas Street apartment. The Oxford Community Police Service said the man was found near Museum Square suffering from multiple stab wounds to the neck, back and chest after fleeing the residence. 

GLASGOW, W.Va. – A Glasgow woman has been charged with throwing a knife and other kitchen utensils at the father of her children. Rachael Renee Payne, 28, is being held at South Central Regional Jail.

WARRINGTON, Pa. -It’s the season for scary movies, but a woman with a knife chasing a Warrington man Saturday afternoon was frighteningly real, police said.  Kathy Sala, 49, wielded the knife as she chased a running man and the dog he was carrying down the 2200 block of Pileggi Road about 3:15 p.m., according to a criminal complaint released Wednesday.

SHREWSBURY, Mass. – A 29-year-old woman was arrested this week for allegedly stabbing her boyfriend with a kitchen knife. Lisa M. Zschuschen, of 12 Anglin Lane, allegedly broke into the home at that address about 9:30 Tuesday morning and attacked a sleeping Douglas R. White, identified in a police report as her romantic partner of four years.


Growing up on Long Island, me and my friends were always interested in the Mafia. The newspapers were filled with lurid stories of mob hits and arrests —and the widow of a well known mafia boss lived down the block from my aunt. And then there was my friend’s father, who we always figured was involved in something illegal. It got to the point that whenever we saw some Italian looking guy drive by in a big car, we figured he was in the mafia. Especially if he was smoking a cigar.

Anyway, it all came rushing back when I saw this story in Newsday about the FBI digging for bodies on Long Island. Yes, the FBI described the job as “conducting a search for physical evidence on the ground,” but that’s obviously shorthand for “digging for bodies.” And how about those pesky reporters? Also from Newsday:

A man who identified himself as the owner of All County Flooring Supply, the business nearest to the Baiting Place Road investigation scene, declined to comment and asked a reporter to leave the store. “We have a business to run,” he said.

“Flooring supply,” indeed.

If The Shoe Hits…

Here’s a little advice: If she gets angry and takes off her shoe? Run.

WEST OCEAN CITY — An Ocean City woman faces assault charges after she allegedly struck a Pirates Cove employee with a shoe, causing injury to his face, and caused a disturbance at the bar with another employee of Pirates Cove on Tuesday. Worcester County Times 9/4/08

BOSTON — A woman was attacked by another woman with a high-heeled shoe and a pint glass in a Nantucket bar over the weekend, according to the Cape Cod Times. Laurie Ray, 36, faced charges Monday of mayhem and assault and battery with a dangerous weapon with intent to maim or disfigure. WCVB-TV 8/28/08

EAST STROUDSBURG –A 22-year-old woman smashed a man in the face with her shoe after he tried to kiss her Friday while she was walking home on Greentree Drive, Stroud Area Regional police said. Police said they found the man, Obispo Lopez-Diaz, 22, of Morristown, N.J., at a gas station on Prospect Street and charged him with indecent assault, stalking, simple assault, harassment and public drunkenness. When police arrived, they saw Lopez-Diaz had an indentation on his face that was ”consistent with being struck with heel of a shoe,” police said. The Morning Call 8/17/08

LINCOLN –A Lincoln woman is behind bars after police say she attacked a man with her high heel shoe. According to witnesses, a 21-year-old man was playing beer pong at a party when Connie Phillips, 22, punched him several times, then hit him in the forehead with her stiletto heel, causing a 1.5-inch gash and knocking him out. KOLN-TV 8/17/08

Sneaking Around

In our house, leaving your sneakers around is a major offense. People are constantly being reminded to pick them up, put them away —just get them out of sight, for god’s sake. And don’t walk in here with dirty shoes, OK?

The Albany County Sheriff’s Department says they arrested a local man after finding his sneakers at the scene of a burglary. He’d removed them before entering the house and allegedly left them behind when he was discovered and ran away. By matching DNA found on the shoes (yuck) they identified him as the suspect. Where’d they get his DNA? Glad you asked. It was taken after a January 2007 burglary arrest —and in 2007 he was identified by the muddy footprints he tracked all over the house. Footprints from his sneakers.

So let’s recap: he learned not to walk through the house with muddy sneakers, but dropped the ball on leaving them laying around. If that’s not proof that you should always listen to your parents, I don’t know what is.