If my wife Ann made a list of things she does not ever want to see on our front lawn, light-up animated reindeer would be number two right behind junk cars. But if there’s one thing I love, it’s a deal and at $10 each how could I say no? And if there’s anything I love more than a deal it’s a surprise —so when she got home last night there they were grazing in the snow. See how they’ve dug it away to get at my lawn? Pesky deer! When I’m sent to live in the basement they’ll make nice decorations.
Categories: Home · Marriage
Tagged: manly matters, Women
I’m not much of a runner, but I still manage to get out there. I do it in all weather all year round —but I will never, ever again think that I’m hardcore -even for a second- after reading this story:
Arizona: Jogger Attacked by Rabid Fox
By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
A jogger was attacked by a rabid fox, ran a mile with the animal’s jaws clamped on her arm and then drove herself to a hospital, the authorities said. The Yavapai County sheriff’s office said the woman told deputies that she was on a trail near Prescott on Monday when the fox attacked and bit her foot. The woman said that she grabbed the fox by the neck when it went for her leg but that it bit her arm. The woman wanted the animal tested for rabies so she ran a mile to her car with the fox still biting her arm, then pried the animal off and tossed it in her trunk and drove to the Prescott hospital. The sheriff’s office said the fox later bit an animal-control officer. He and the woman are both receiving rabies vaccinations.
By the way: runners get all bent out of shape when you call them “joggers” —especially if they have a fox hanging off their arm.
Alright, it’s been established that if a woman gets angry she may use her shoe to attack you —but if she gets really, really angry she’s heading for the kitchen.
NORWICH, Conn. - A Norwich woman was arrested Wednesday night on charges she slashed a man with a meat cleaver during a domestic dispute.
WOODSTOCK, Ont. - Police have a woman in custody after a downtown stabbing early Thursday morning. A 45-year-old man was rushed to hospital around 12 a.m., after an altercation with a known suspect at a Dundas Street apartment. The Oxford Community Police Service said the man was found near Museum Square suffering from multiple stab wounds to the neck, back and chest after fleeing the residence.
GLASGOW, W.Va. - A Glasgow woman has been charged with throwing a knife and other kitchen utensils at the father of her children. Rachael Renee Payne, 28, is being held at South Central Regional Jail.
WARRINGTON, Pa. -It’s the season for scary movies, but a woman with a knife chasing a Warrington man Saturday afternoon was frighteningly real, police said. Kathy Sala, 49, wielded the knife as she chased a running man and the dog he was carrying down the 2200 block of Pileggi Road about 3:15 p.m., according to a criminal complaint released Wednesday.
SHREWSBURY, Mass. - A 29-year-old woman was arrested this week for allegedly stabbing her boyfriend with a kitchen knife. Lisa M. Zschuschen, of 12 Anglin Lane, allegedly broke into the home at that address about 9:30 Tuesday morning and attacked a sleeping Douglas R. White, identified in a police report as her romantic partner of four years.
Categories: News
Tagged: crime, men, relationships, Women
Here’s a little advice: If she gets angry and takes off her shoe? Run.
WEST OCEAN CITY — An Ocean City woman faces assault charges after she allegedly struck a Pirates Cove employee with a shoe, causing injury to his face, and caused a disturbance at the bar with another employee of Pirates Cove on Tuesday. Worcester County Times 9/4/08
BOSTON — A woman was attacked by another woman with a high-heeled shoe and a pint glass in a Nantucket bar over the weekend, according to the Cape Cod Times. Laurie Ray, 36, faced charges Monday of mayhem and assault and battery with a dangerous weapon with intent to maim or disfigure. WCVB-TV 8/28/08
EAST STROUDSBURG –A 22-year-old woman smashed a man in the face with her shoe after he tried to kiss her Friday while she was walking home on Greentree Drive, Stroud Area Regional police said. Police said they found the man, Obispo Lopez-Diaz, 22, of Morristown, N.J., at a gas station on Prospect Street and charged him with indecent assault, stalking, simple assault, harassment and public drunkenness. When police arrived, they saw Lopez-Diaz had an indentation on his face that was ”consistent with being struck with heel of a shoe,” police said. The Morning Call 8/17/08
LINCOLN –A Lincoln woman is behind bars after police say she attacked a man with her high heel shoe. According to witnesses, a 21-year-old man was playing beer pong at a party when Connie Phillips, 22, punched him several times, then hit him in the forehead with her stiletto heel, causing a 1.5-inch gash and knocking him out. KOLN-TV 8/17/08
Categories: News
Tagged: crime, current events, Women
The truth about women is that women rule the world. They are sensible and sane, and when driven to action they are extremely effective. Don’t cross them. The Glens Falls Post Star this morning reports:
FORT ANN — A 43-year-old woman has been charged with felony assault for allegedly beating a man with a piece of lumber, police said. Barbara A. Weaver, of Route 40, allegedly hit a man she knows in the back of the head twice, causing injuries that required treatment at Glens Falls Hospital.
Ouch. Wonder if she read our item about choosing the right wood for the job?
As for women being effective, watch this video of a woman catching a bat in her house. Yeah, that’s cool —but look closely and you can see her male companion cowering outside the door, handing her the bat catching supplies. Dude!
Categories: Modern Living · News
Tagged: diy, manly matters, men, Women
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