The Witching Hour

Some say that a Halloween costume is a window into the soul that reveals your subconscious mind. Let’s hope not.

I had planned to dress as a Jedi knight for a party last Saturday night but somewhere along the line things went terribly awry. Instead of a wise and noble warrior with a light saber I somehow ended up as a witch. Think Dame Edna meets Margaret Hamilton meets Janeane Garofalo.

Half the fun of Halloween is making your costume and the most interesting part of this project was filling the $5 bra that came from WalMart. 44D, since I know you’re wondering. After doing extensive research on the internet I found that stuffing a stocking with rice is a method favored by frugal transvestites everywhere. Don’t look this up at work. As you can see here I weighed them to guarantee uniformity.

Overall the project was a big success and fortunately I was only hit on once. The next morning I was feeling a little off from the late night and rich food. My wife, Ann, quipped, “Maybe you’re getting your period.”

Ha ha.

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