Witless

I’ve figured out why AMC’s The Walking Dead is such a bummer: the show is completely humorless.

And what’s so funny about brain eating zombies?

Nothing — but horror aficionados know that the best work has some laughs to diffuse the tension. Without that, it’s just a relentless downer, but mix in some funny bits with the scares and you have a winner.

Right wing talk radio is like the horror genre in that regard. You may hate Rush Limbaugh’s politics, but he can be entertaining. Even while you disagree, it’s fun to listen.

You can’t really say the same for Talk 1300’s Paul Vandenburgh. I’ve been listening to him for years and never once heard him say anything that’s funny. Not a joke, never a witty remark, no humorous observations. Never. Not once.

Some people think humor is related to intelligence, but not always.

Vandenburgh’s obviously smart enough to pull in some listeners with his angry guy schtick — and smart enough to be 13% owner of his radio station — so he must be smart enough to come up with a zinger now and then.

Right?

Maybe not.

I think there’s something else going on with humorless people and those with no appreciation for irony: they are missing a certain part of their brain. Whatever little node or fold that makes a person funny is absent or undeveloped.

In the interest of science, I hope we can get hold of the brains of some of these humorless people when they’re gone — not in the zombie sense, but for research. We must find a way to help them. God knows, we’d all be better off.

5 thoughts on “Witless

  1. Rob, you are making personal progress. There was once a time you would have suggested that Vandenburgh has no brain, not a defective brain.

    Yes, he brings in listeners, but there’s evidence that his audience is shrinking. That may not hurt Talk 1300 financially. They sell to advertisers based on the qualities of the audience, not its size. The sales pitch is that business leaders and influential people listen. They also appeal to advertisers who simply agree with Vandenburgh’s bullshit.

    This is why you hear no large, traditional advertisers on his station. They buy strictly on ratings, not on emotion and made up stuff about the audience.

  2. If you won’t say that Vandenburgh is stupid, I will.

    He has the attention span of a gnat, flitting around from topic to topic in a way that makes him sound like a mental patient.

    His opinions on national issues are ripped right from what he hears other conservative blowhards say — and his views on local issues are based mostly on his contempt for politicians, unions, public employees, minorities and immigrants.

    He appeals to the basest emotions of his listeners: hate, resentment and fear.

    He knows nothing of the world and wamts to know nothing of it. His show is not merely stupid, it’s a celebration of stupidity.

    I’m a little surprised you didn’t say anything when Vandenburgh was featured in Kristi’s “20 Things” item. It’s disgusting that she would normalize this hateful piece of shit. Unbelievable.

    1. Faithful, I enjoy those “20 Things” pieces and always read them. I suppose that people we find interesting don’t have to be good people.

      Vandenburgh does what he does because it’s his job. If he thought he could make more money doing liberal talk, he’d sound like a cross between Noam Chomsky and Michael Moore.

      Let’s assume that it’s part of his job to sound stupid.

      At the end of the day, it’s just an act. It’s a put on.

  3. Well, I listened to Vandenburgh defend Roy Moore all morning — which pretty much makes him a revolting bag of shit, in my opinion.

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