One of the nice things about Christmas is its extortion value over children.
If you have young ones you’ve probably done it: played the “naughty or nice†card to keep your kids in line. Well, in recent years this has taken a new turn with Elf on the Shelf. It is, in short, an elf that you put on the shelf to do Santa’s spying.
Elf on the Shelf was the brainchild of author/entrprenuers Carol Aebersold and Chanda Bell, who in 2005 published a children’s book of the same name. Each book comes complete with a little elf doll who, like in the story, will report misdeeds back to his boss at the North Pole.
The elf gets its magic power when named by your child. Isn’t that sweet?
I suppose it won’t be long before these come equipped with a hidden camera, because then you could actually use the elf to do some real spying. Imagine the fun of feeding your local department store Santa a nugget of two of information:
“HO! HO! HO! You know, little missy… I saw you take those cookies off the counter. And you know it’s not nice to pull the cat’s tail!â€
That will make them true believers, won’t it? In fact, it could be effective enough to last all year long. Santa is always watching. And he could probably send a postcard or two during the year, little reminders that that he sees all, and is indeed keeping a list.
I sort of feel partly responsible for this particular blog post, since I mentioned Elf on a Shelf in a previous one not too log ago.
A couple of clarifying points:
1. The Elf flys home to the North Pole each nite when your child goes to bed, then reappears in a new spot when she /he wakes up;
2. Your child is never to touch the elf — probably due to some sexual harrassment regs that the Kringles introduced after that incident involving Hermey and the cowboy who rode an ostrich on the Island of Misfit Toys;
3. The Elf’s job is done on Christmas Eve — mercifully for all parents who have to keep scratching their heads to figure out a new spot to move the little interloper.
While Rob has some concerns about it, it’s innocuous enough fun. As far as Santa periodically sending a postcard to remind youngsters to be good, I don’t know about that. I mean, I’ve been regularly sending cards and letters to the Great Pumpkin for years, and my pumpkin patch has never been chosen as the most sincere yet:)
My concerns are obviously tongue in cheek — but the sooner children learn that they have no privacy in our society, the better.
Wow, what stupid bullsh*t. I hope the parents who do this get shingles this Christmas.
Shingles? You mean roofing shingles, sort of like getting coal in one’s stocking — or THESE shingles:
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/shingles/DS00098/DSECTION=symptoms
Bring back Krampus. That’s true Christmas fear.
What a kind, charitable, sensitive and gracious woman Barbara must be. Ma’am, when you were young, did you beat children up for laughs or for their allowances?