When You Gotta Go

I’m constantly having to stop to go to the bathroom, to the point that it’s a big joke in my family. Hahahaha… Dad’s going pee again. Hilarious.

Just to set the record straight, there’s nothing wrong with me, I just like to stay well-hydrated — and all that water has to go somewhere. As a result, I’ve peed in some pretty weird places — but one thing I’ve never done is take a leak on TV, like Chargers kicker Nick Novak.

There was 1:34 left in Sunday’s game against Denver and the score was tied at 13-13 — so really, the last thing a placekicker can do is disappear from the sidelines when the game hangs in the balance. This was his solution:

OK, that’s a bit crazy, but what would you do?

While ESPN The Magazine did a fascinating story about pooping during games, less has been written about urinating. If I were Novak I probably would have just let it rip, right in my pants, because it seems unlikely anyone would have noticed they were wet. I can’t speak for whether it would influence his kicking.

There is no easy answer to this situation — and Depends are out of the question when wearing such tight pants — but we must salute Mr. Novak for being able pee with so many people watching. That takes true concentration.

Unfortunately, Mr. Novak’s concentration failed him in overtime as he sent a 53-yarder wide right, and the Broncos went on to win the game.

2 thoughts on “When You Gotta Go

  1. Overheard on the Charger’s bench a couple minutes into overtime: “Hey Novak, that Gatorade you gave me is extra tangy! Thanks”

  2. That ESPN The Magazine article you linked might be the best thing I’ve read all week. My MiL has set Iron Man records in her age group (she’s doing them in her dang 60’s!), so this is going to be a great conversation piece over Christmas dinner – and I can guarantee she’s probably read it already too!

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